Sidhuisms --- 1

You cheat God thousands of times but God is so kind that he does not punish you each time. He just gets you married once.

Worry is a misuse of the imagination my dear friends...

Sign on an enquiry counter: "Please be patient - Even a toilet can handle only one a$$#ole at a time!"

Rajasthan Royals should learn from their owner - Shilpa Shetty. They did not deliver. She did...

Anyone can make you smile, many people can make you cry, but it takes someone really special to make you smile with tears in your eyes my dear friends.

Time is like a stream. You cannot touch the same water twice because the water that has flowed will never pass again... my dear friends!

People say marriage brings spice, tears, happiness, flavour and taste to life. Personally my dear friends, I believe Paani Puri does a better job.

Women are like phones, they like to be held, talked to and touched often. But push the wrong button and you're disconnected.

Money, Attitude & Ego are like undergarments. You should have them, but never show them my dear friends.

Flirting is like a game of Chess, One wrong move and you're married my dear friends!

An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it's going to launch you into something great. So just focus, and keep aiming my dear friends!

A nation roared and the whole world sat up to notice the Indian team’s supremacy over world cricket. The Indian team with its performance in the World Cup had endeared itself to the people and had made room in a billion hearts.

Criticism should be like gentle rain that helps the crops to nourish, not to create flood & destroy!

The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts while the stupid ones are full of confidence my dear friends!

It is very difficult to understand why God creates beautiful women & then turns them into neighbours' wives...my dear friends.

Alcohol is like love. The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate & the third is routine my dear friends ....

If you don't do stupid things while you're young, you'll have nothing to smile about when you're old... my dear friends.

An idea without action is like a car without an engine, my dear friends...

It's so easy for a man to understand a wife when she isn`t His, my dear friends!

By the time you realise, what your parents said was RIGHT; You'll have kids who begin to think you're WRONG, my dear friends!

Impossible is just the opinion of somebody who does not believe as much as you do, my dear friends!

Who is a Psychiatrist? A qualified person who gives you an expensive & critical analysis about yourself, which your spouse gives you for free, daily.

Most women usually have only 2 problems, my dear friends... 1. Nothing to wear. 2. No place to put all the clothes.

The happiest people don't have the best of everything, they just make the best of everything my dear friends!

Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob the world my dear friends!

Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you're donating blood my dear friends!

Don't trust your heart because it's not on the right side my dear friends!

A relationship without trust is like a cellphone with no service. And what do you do with a cellphone with no service? You play games.

An intelligent wife is one who makes sure she spends so much that her husband can't afford another woman.

Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage, the "y" becomes silent. #Sidhuisms

If couples who are in love are called 'love birds'; then couples who're always arguing should be called 'angry birds'.

Can a woman make you a millionaire? Yes! Only if you are a billionaire my dear friends!

My dear friends... When a man becomes rich he becomes naughty & when a woman becomes naughty.... she becomes rich!

Budha left his palace in search of peace and we budhus (nincompoops) leave peace in search of palace.

Trust is the most important part of a relationship. You must be 100% sure that she won't tell your wife, my dear friends!

What`s common between clouds and wife, my dear friends? When both are not around, we call it a bright day.

Sachin Tendulkar drives the ball faster than Michael Schumacher's Ferrari, my dear friends!

Bad results and arrogance are a perfect mix for a quick exit. England, if losing wasn't bad enough, you are losing it like a loser!

If victory is certain then even a coward can fight, But the real brave is the one who still dares to fight when his defeat is certain.

People change, Times change, Life changes but the one thing that doesn't change is your blood group my dear friends!

If you never thank God after every smile then you have no right to blame him for every tear, my dear friends!

A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him. Chah Gaye Dhoni!

Success is like a beautiful girl it will leave us at any time, but failure is like a mother it will teach us some important lessons of life.

Squeeze the past like a sponge, smell the present like a rose, and send a kiss to the future.

It takes patience to keep a nagging wife; fortune to keep an ambitious wife; four eyes to keep a pretty wife.

What is old age? When you start turning off lights for economical reasons rather than romantic reasons.

Doubt is a mountain and faith is some thing that either destroys the mountain or creates a tunnel through the mountain, my dear friends!

I can count the no. of seeds in the apple but I cannot count the no. of apples in a seed. Future is unseen so always hope for the best.

Why do they refer to nature as a woman? Because no one can know its exact age, my dear friends.

One must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them and strong enough to rectify them. #Sidhuisms

30 Navjot Singh Sidhu Quotes That Only He Could Have Cracked

If there’s one person who deserves the title of ‘absolute entertainer’ it’s the one and only Navjot Singh Sidhu. From reciting poems that are pages long to impossible one-liners, Sidhu is a treasure chest of awesomeness.

We have compiled the 30 best Sidhuisms which will make you go WOW for this man of words!

1. Arguing with Martin Crowe over the nature of wickets.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

2. When Ganguly took a catch after the ball stayed in the air for a long time.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

3. On Kaluwitharna’s slow batting rate.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

4. During an India vs New Zealand match to Martin Crowe.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

5. During a match where Team India was collapsing.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

6. During another match where Team India was not faring well.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

7. During yet another match where Team India was doing badly.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

8. On cricket statistics.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

9. Siddhu taking a potshot at Geoffrey Boycott’s lack of hair.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

10. On Eddie Nichols, the third umpire, who gave a wrong decision.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

11. Siddhu having another go at third umpires.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

12. On the value of experience.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

13. On a batsman getting bowled through the gap between bat and pad.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

14. On a batsman who was completely out of form.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

15. On Sachin not playing in a match.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

16. On Ganguly running Rahul Dravid out.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

17. On a dropped catch.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

18. On Indian Cricketer Deep Dasgupta.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

19. On a slow ball delivered by a bowler.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

20. On Ganguly’s poor fielding.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

21. On India’s home ground advantage.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

22. On Balaji’s great bowling.

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

And now some general pearls of wisdom from Sidhu:

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
• 

• 
• 
• 
• 
•